


Sparks

by LiraelClayr007



Series: NaPoWriMo 2020 [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Introspection, M/M, POV Castiel (Supernatural), Pining, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-03
Updated: 2020-04-03
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:06:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23454505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LiraelClayr007/pseuds/LiraelClayr007
Summary: Cas thinks about his deal with the Empty.He tells himselfit doesn’t matter,that happinessis a human thingand not attaining itis no great loss,no great sacrifice.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Series: NaPoWriMo 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1686106
Comments: 2
Kudos: 11





	Sparks

It’s not all that hard  
for him to keep away  
from happiness. These days  
are dark,  
brutal,  
one hit after another.

Sometimes  
there are flashes,  
flickers,  
but a spark  
in the darkness  
with nothing to catch  
cannot start a blazing  
fire.

He came close,  
in purgatory.  
Dean prayed to him,  
their brokenness healed,  
and the warmth  
inside was closer to  
happiness  
than he’d felt in years–  
but just in time he’d  
remembered  
that his feelings  
and Dean’s could never  
match,  
and the flicker  
died.

He tells himself  
it doesn’t matter,  
that happiness  
is a human thing  
and not attaining it  
is no great loss,  
no great sacrifice.  
And anyway, if it is,  
it’s all for the humans he  
protects. For his  
family. For the humans he–

But he cannot use that word.  
It’s a human word too,  
that blazing feeling that  
overwhelms  
even happiness.

He doesn’t speak it,  
tries not to even think it,  
but he holds onto it,  
because it’s all that matters  
anymore.

**Author's Note:**

> NaPoWriMo Day 2
> 
> Prompts: Castiel and afraid to be happy


End file.
